You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic:

There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the International music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

You should write at least 250 words. Use your own ideas, knowledge and experience and support your arguments with examples and relevant evidence.

People need music in their life. Music contains of many things that we never think. The important thing is music can show feelings more than words can. Music can make people smile, laugh, or maybe cry. Music makes harmony in life. People enjoy music at many part of their life, not only in Physical life but also in spiritual life. Many religions use music to tell about their value in life.

There are many kinds of music. Start from the slow one to the hard one. It can describe a level of people. The old one like classic music because it is slow and makes people feels comfort and relaxes. The young people like beat music like rock, pop rock, alternative, and others that will show the energy of the music. Music can come to people mind easily. People use music to makes their heart and mind feel comfort.

In every country, there is traditional music. The traditional music comes from the earlier people in one area. They find or invent the traditional music from simple tools. In the past, they use it for tell message to others. Then, other uses it together with other tools to make music. People need to know about traditional music because it is one of the national treasures of one country. People need to keep it alive so they need to know and learn about it. Maybe not all of traditional music is easy listening and interesting to play like the modern one, but they still need to keep it.

People need to thank to some musician who can combine the traditional music with the modern music. They can make a new kind of music. They make music library richer. They also keep the traditional music alive. We need more people to do this to make the traditional one still alive, so the next day when the children grow up, they can know about their traditional music.

The modern music is also important. It makes people knowledge about music grow up. In addition, people need to combine one to other modern music to make it more beautiful. Finally, people need to learn and keep all kind of music even it is traditional or modern. People can make any different of them, they need to make the same facilities for others who want to play and learn.

Score By : Grammarly : 71

Incorrect use of prepositions (1)
Verb agreement (1)
Other (2)
Wordiness (2)
Punctuation within a sentence (2)
Vocabulary use (4)

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